Slight Hitch in Our Giddy Up

Ah, yes, the wit and weirdness of Dan Rather . Seems some folks just noticed his penchant for quirky, perhaps self-invented metaphors during this past week's election coverage. But I remember him doling 'em out like chicken gizzards from a fishing pale last time round.

Some choice examples:

Is it like a swan, with every feather above the water settled, but under the water paddling like crazy?

Now, ladies and gentleman, if you believe that, you'll believe rocks can grow.

We used to say if a frog had side pockets, he'd carry a handgun.

Feel free to contribute your own. For example, in honor of the Dan, I told a friend who rises early, "You'll be up before the catfish are burping and swallows are chasing their tails around the maypole." Remember: Nothing says they hafta make any sense.